At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Randomize
