No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
