Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
