Little spoons don't ask big questions
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
