I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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