Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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