Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Betty ford says i'm here all night
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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