You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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