i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Randomize
