Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Who did Billy Mays play for?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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