She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
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