xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
