Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
