school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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