I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Randomize