Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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