Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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