i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Randomize
