so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
