Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
