Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I need a burrito and a hug.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
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