Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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