Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Randomize
