Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
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