We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
