So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
