But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
