i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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