Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Holy sore nipples Batman
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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