I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
