think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
