I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
