Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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