Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Randomize
