the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
He better not be in your backpack
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
