also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Randomize
