is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
