I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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