im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
