I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Blood and glitter go together right?
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
Randomize
