That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
