You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize