i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
