You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Randomize
