You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
