is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Randomize
