I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
we're so committed to being not committed
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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