There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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