Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
