so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
